How to be a Better Listener

Listening isn’t as easy as it “sounds.” This article provides four valuable techniques to help you be a better listener to those who value you the most.

A wise man once said, “people don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” In other words, everybody wants to be heard, but it’s a lot harder to want to listen to someone else, especially when the feedback is unpleasant. The Law of Attraction supports the importance of giving what you hope to receive, as it’s held in the belief that you will get out of the universe what you are willing to put in it. In other words, if you want people to listen to you, you need to be ready to listen to other people.

But people have different abilities to listen. Some abilities are hindered by the ways in which they grew up. Others have innate personality variables which make it hard to listen. And still, others have such adverse circumstances that they don’t trust their partners (or themselves for that matter) to fully create a space for listening.

This can leave your relationships feeling strained and unhealthy.

Here are some strategies that you can begin implementing immediately, so that you can be a better listener:

Body language counts. You don’t just listen to someone with your ears; you also listen with your body. Think about it. If your arms are crossed, this gives off the feeling that you are creating a barrier between yourself and the person who is speaking with you. It shows disapproval, and resistance to whatever is coming at you. To the contrary, if you make eye contact, this demonstrates that you are completely engaged with what they are saying and that you value their perspective.

Ditch the distractions. We live in a world where we glamorize the idea of multitasking. But the truth is, people who are most successful, are successful because they know how to prioritize what’s most important. If you are needing to listen to someone, chances are, you’ll do a better job of it if they have your undivided attention.

Listen to the entire conversation. This can be particularly difficult if the person is saying things that you disagree with. But if you listen to their prospective first, it should open an opportunity for them to listen to your perspective at the appropriate time. That way, two of you can both Express Yourself effectively and give each other the respect that you both deserve.

Paraphrase what your partner said. This shows that you heard them and you understand where they are coming from. You can start your sentence with the following, “what I heard you say was…” When you do this, you validate the other persons persepctive and open the door for the other person to clarify their thoughts.

Anybody can hear what other people say, but listening is a communication skill that can always be improved. Hopefully, you find that these skills can be useful to help you become a better listener.

If you would like someone to listen to you,


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