When it comes to initiating sex, the desire is usually there but you’re unsure how to make your move. Here are some tips on how to initiate sex that will be sure to get the ball rolling in no time!
1. Be vulnerable and open up about your feelings. Sex is a huge part of a relationship and is very pivotal and keeping people close and connected. Therefore, talking about it should be normal in order to ensure that it’s appropriately experience. The truth is, if being honest about having sex is something that you cannot talk about, then the true issues that you are experiencing regarding is deeper then the sex.
2. Get comfortable with nudity – take a shower together or just be naked around each other in the house. This is a no-brainer. Seeing your significant other nude, it’s one of the best ways to send visual signals to the brain about sex.
3. Initiate sex by touching, kissing, or any other way you feel comfortable. Make sure that you are aware of what your partners comfort zone is as well, so that these efforts will be embraced as opposed to discard it.
4. Talk dirty to them while initiating sex – this can help get their mind off of what’s going on and make it more enjoyable for both of you. In addition to visual, discussing sex can be a great turn on for your significant other as well as yourself. Verbalize what you want and act accordingly.
5. Create an environment that is conducive to intimacy – dim lights, candles, etc., but don’t overdo it because you don’t want them to think that you’re trying too hard. Let’s face it. It’s hard to ignore sexual signals, when your environment alludes sex. But if there are toys in the bedroom and baby music playing in the background, sex will likely be the last thing on your partner’s mind.
6. Stay away from alcohol if possible because it can lead to bad decisions, especially if you haven’t had sex in a while. Simply put, alcohol can Cloud your judgement so you don’t want to insert a mind-altering substance into a sexual activity that you are already struggling to achieve. Proceed with a sober mind, irrespective of the outcome.
7 . Don’t try to initiate sex when they are tired or distracted (e.g., watching TV). This we’ll just make the situation worse because when you’re not focused on what you are trying to do, you don’t do as good of a job at it. As a result, the outcome will be weaker.
8 . Make sure they know how much you want them before initiating anything; this will make them more receptive and less likely to reject your advances. This can be done by following the seven steps.
There are many reasons to initiate sex. Some people do it because they’re horny, some people do it just because they want to get closer with their partner, and others may feel obligated due to an anniversary or special occasion coming up. Whatever the reason, starting a relationship is hard work and initiating sex can make things easier for both parties involved! Our black therapists have seen all types of couples in their office so there’s no need to be embarrassed about what you don’t know when it comes to getting physical with your significant other. If you’re feeling frustrated that your partner isn’t responding positively (or negatively) after being intimate, our team might be able to help by providing insight on how this person thinks as well.